Title: Chocolate Kisses
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Summary: Make an offer.
Beta: By my sister Anna. All remaining errors are mine-with apologies
“You kissed him. I can’t believe you kissed him,” John hissed at Rodney.
Unperturbed Rodney looked over at the riled Colonel. “What are you talking about?” he asked, biting into his roll. Ah, food. He loved food. Breakfast, lunch, dinner. Didn’t matter. And this particular lunch had been surprisingly fine.
“YOU. KISSED. BECKETT.”
“No I didn’t. That was Laura Cadman. I’d never kiss Beckett,” Rodney replied, shivering dramatically.
John frowned at him. “No? I distinctly remember your lips on his. You kissed him.”
Rodney’s eyebrows drew together. “I’m telling you that was Laura. She was in my head, remember?”
“Your lips touched Beckett’s.”
Rodney tilted his head sideways as he contemplated the Colonel. “Why does it bother you so much?”
John sat back in his chair. “It doesn’t bother me. Did I say it bother me?”
“Well, you keep bringing it up. So, I’d say, yes, it’s bothering you.”
John crossed his arms as he angrily glared at the scientist. “All right, fine, it bothers me. Wanna make something out of it?”
Rodney shook his head as he decided whether he wanted his strawberry jello now or save it for later. “No. Far be it for me to make sense out of a wacked-out Rambo.”
John’s eyebrows drew together even tighter, forming an almost straight line across his forehead. “Are you saying I’m wacked out?”
Rodney picked up his spoon, deciding he did indeed want his jello now. “Yes, I’m afraid I am. Hmm, this jello’s good. Are you going to eat yours?”
John pushed his little jello bowl over toward Rodney. “I’m not wacked out.”
“Yes, you are. You’re making this into a bigger deal than it really is.”
“You kissed Beckett.”
Rodney looked up, from scraping the last of his jello. “So? It’s not like I’m in the military.”
“Have you ever even kissed a male before?”
Rodney bit his bottom lip, blue eyes looking toward the ceiling as he thought about it. “Well, there was Melvin.”
John sat up straighter in his chair. “You kissed someone named Melvin?”
Rodney made a dismissive motion with his spoon. “Oh, please. I was five and he was sharing his Smarties with me.”
“So you kissed this Melvin person because he gave you candy?”
Rodney started working on the jello John had given him. “Yup. I love chocolate. That’s no secret.”
“That makes you SO easy.”
“You say that as if it’s a bad thing.”
“Rodney, if I offered you chocolate for some kisses would you give them to me?” John asked softly, too softly.
“What kind of chocolate?” Rodney asked, curiously.
“What kind would buy me kisses?”
Rodney looked around the mess. Tayla had jello. He wondered if she’d give it to him. Since she didn’t seem to be too interested in it. “Real chocolate,” he answered, absently, getting up from his chair. “Hey, Tayla-are you going to eat your Jello?”
She offered it to him with a small smile and Rodney quickly forgot all about John and his weird conversation as other members of Atlantis began offering the scientist their desserts as well. Rodney was becoming a favorite of many of them, once they saw beyond his whiny, aggravating ways, to what lay beyond. A brave and noble soul despite what his mouth was usually rattling.
He never saw John Sheppard’s hazel eyes on him or the thoughtful look in them as he watched Rodney quickly gathering his Jello stash. Before he rose from his chair and left the mess hall.
The scientist looked up from his laptop. “Yes, Colonel? What can I do for you?” he asked, impatiently.
John didn’t answer, walking into the room until he was inches from Rodney. He opened his hand, resting in the palm where three Hershey kisses.
Rodney looked at the candy and then up at John. “For me?”
“How many kisses will they buy?”
Rodney’s confusion deepened. “Buy? What are you talking about?”
“How many kisses will they buy?” John repeated.
The confusion cleared as Rodney’s very clear and sharp mind thought back to what could be causing this odd behavior in the Colonel. “Oh,” he whispered, softly.
“You can’t be serious,” Rodney replied, looking up into Sheppard’s very handsome face. Surely he wouldn’t need to buy kisses with chocolate, most assuredly not from him. Truth be told, he’d give John kisses for free.
“I am. How many?”
“B…but you don’t even like me.”
“How many?” Sheppard asked, impatiently.
Rodney nibbled on his bottom lip, not missing the way Sheppard followed the movement hungrily. “Ah-three pieces of chocolate would earn you three kisses. Does that sound fair?”
John nodded. Placing the chocolate on the desk he pulled Rodney into his arms and kissed him-hard.
“One,” John said, pulling away.
“Colonel, before you claim any more kisses. May I ask what’s brought on this strange behavior?” he asked, just as John began moving in for another kiss.
“I watched you kiss
“B…but that wasn’t even a real kiss. It may have been my lips that kissed him, but my heart and soul wasn’t in it,” Rodney told John, who was listening intently. “It wasn’t me kissing him, Colonel.”
John ran his thumb over Rodney’s lip. “What would it be like if your heart and soul were in it, Rodney?”
The scientist nipped the thumb. “Earth shattering, I would imagine.”
John smiled. “I bet. I’ve got two pieces of candy left. Wanna show me earth shattering?”
“Alright.” Rodney shoved John against the wall hard, earning a sharp grunt of pain. It was quickly swallowed by the scientist’s mouth.
Rodney went after John like a man starved and desperate to be fed. By the time he began pulling away John was giving the strangest mewling noises. Rodney rested his forehead against the trembling man’s.
“How’s that?” he whispered softly.
Rodney pulled away slightly to nibble on the side of John’s neck. “Rodney got your tongue?”
John chuckled weakly. “Yeah, and I’d eventually like it back.”
“Now?” Rodney asked, sucking delicately on John’s Adam’s apple.
John moaned softly, arching his head back to allow Rodney better access. “I’ll claim it back when I get another earth-shattering kiss? I really like those and I still got one piece of candy left.”
Rodney chuckled against his neck. “As you wish.” Opening his mouth he took John’s in another kiss. It was passionate, it was hot and it felt so very illegal as Rodney’s tongue did stuff to his mouth no one had ever done before.
Rodney smiled softly to himself as John began doing those funny little mewling noises again. They were kinda cute.
“Wow,” John replied, unsteadily. “I never realized you were so hot,” He said, when he finally, reluctantly pulled away.
“Oh, please. I may act like a shivering wall-flower, but I’m hardly that. Not with something I really want,” Rodney replied, nibbling on John’s earlobe.
“I’ve got a whole bag of candy in my room,” John said, meeting Rodney blue eyes. “What would that get me?”
Rodney smiled, unbuttoning the first two buttons of John’s uniform. Stroking the skin revealed with his forefinger. “Oh, I think a whole bag would get you a night of the wildest sex you’ve ever had in two galaxies.”
John took the roving hand in his. “Cool. Lets go.” Tugging him toward the door.
“Wait. Wait.” Rodney reached over and gathered the three little Hershey kisses resting on his desk. He smiled at John’s curious look. “I’m having these babies bronzed. A remembrance of when John Sheppard gave Rodney McKay one of the best offers he’s ever gotten, especially since coming to the Pegasus galaxy.”